just came back from 2E chalet! <3

mygodness we're super unlucky! we got bloody L block for the chalet room which's bloody far from the entrance (its like the furthest block). it takes 5 minutes to walk to the chalet! and no more than 5 minute sinto the chalet derek got all wet cos he tried washing his legs and the shower tap actually popped off, so water was spraying everywhere in the shower. later chiahau got even more wet trying to fix it. haha.

we went to tampines mall to catch a rather late night movie and we wanted to watch colic, but it was NC 16 ( i totally don't knw why) so in the end we settled with mo gong, STARRING ANDY LAU. ohmyfreakinggod i tell you he's freaking gorg for someone his age! and okay the story's good too but it was so bloody cold inside the cinema. there was even a black in the movie haha! after we movie we walked for bloody long to get to the bus stop for fandi to take bus 12 home, but bus 12 never came and in the end she took a cab home lol.

last night was mostly about the bbq, so much happened, and it was in sucha hurry; we went to white sands to get all the stuff we needed for bbq, kenneth, chee guan, weicheng and elvis finally came for the bbq; huanjun crashed our bbq w/o paying a single cent (tht cheapo claims he's only got 40 cents left); june lost her wallet halfway through & geraldine felt so bad; and hansen came over to do some magic. we had so many people who were'nt even in 2E in our chalet! jerome brought keith and huanjun was crashing on the bbq and xboxing, eugene and justus came over 'cos they were too bored in their own band chalet.

haha the bbq was hilarious! geraldine kenneth cheeguan & I was trying to skewer the hotdogs and stuff and I infered upon kenneth the great post of Quality Control. so he's like

kenneth: [poking at the chicken breast meat, frowning] this one a lot of fat. FAIL! must peel off!

i laughed crazy. haha. june and the rest of the guys went off for midnight cycling and fandi and i actually intended to do some girls' talk when they were out cos we'd be the only ones left but eugene and justus came over & in the end we playd bridge tgth. it was esp fun cos of the ridiculous bids! (:

this morning we checked out and we decided to go to thaddeus's house to play bridge and stuff cos we were bloody chased out of UTP cos of tht stupidsucker joseph. i the end we spent the whole afternoon playing at the playgrd underneath his house, we actually had a lot of fun playing crocodile. HAHA.

i can't believe i've got to drag myself out of bed early next morning. Later.
i was reading through my old emails and i discovered this! i typed this on july 6th, when i was really feeling down about the whole comp team life. i cried like crazy when i typed this! i never got the courage to send it though i was so afraid it'd pull down the team's morale but it was truereflection of what i felt at that point of time. i'm a little bit amazed, i sound sort of sensible in this email. HAHA.

have you all noticed? i have less interest in st john, comp trains now. i'm no longer the passionate cadet i was in sec1/2, so eager to start my comp train life, no longer the cadet tht was hoping i cld get into comp team. yeah i think you all did. i dont know what made me lose my interest, (or rather lose most of the interest). i think the culprit's time. a lot of times, i hate being in comp team because i know its such a heavy responsibility and i have to give up so many things tht if given a choice to reconsider again, i wld nvr give it up for.

being in comp team has taught me a lot, has brought me many fond memories, way more than our other sqdmates. i still feel nationals's far away though its so close.. if you all know me well enough, i think you all understand i'm not a person who likes to be tied down with something & in turn having to shift and put aside evrything else. i hate being tied down. i hate not having enough time to do what i like and want do.

i know yahui's and mianmian's emails have a different 'tone' from my email. for theirs its all about enouraging and putting in yr last efforts and evrything but for mine its all about myself myself myself. sry about tht but i feel this is the only way i can explain myself, what i am thinking & why i behave the way i do.

sometimes i feel so envious that the rest of our sqdmates can lead such free lives and not be tied down by such responsibilities. i'm envious tht when we are training and being sad about not doing a case well, they are eating, laughing, having great time with each other, playing vball whatsoever. they dont have to worry if they can rmb extra information about stroke. they dont have to bother reading the first aid manual to find out why you can't lay an asthma casualty down. they don't have to wake up early during holidays to come to school to spend at least 4 sucky hours in sch training.

i know each of us have something we'd rather do than having so many trainings. maybe mianmian wld rather solve math problems than come down for trainings. maybe cheryl'd rather go for church than train. maybe daphne would rather spend more time in physics tuition. maybe yahui'd rather spend time with her family. i dont know, but i know you all are not so selfish. which is why sometimes i really envy you guys have having the determination & perserverance to continue on & strive towards better results.

i havent been a very good team member. i havent been a good no3, nor a good relative-handling patient. i hate it when anyone mentions that they hope we get nat champs, probably because i know i may be the person who hasn't put in enough effort. i hate hate hate hate having such good mentors and teammates because all the more it makes me feel guilty.

all through the year, we have no time to rest. training for zone comp then training for nationals then preparing for POP, afterwhich comes std one comp & THEN THE ENTIRE CYCLE STARTS AGAIN. when we have the time to breathe? we never had. i still rmb in sec1, mdm jiayi interviewed me about being in comp team, asking me whether i think i'd be able to commit. i answered yes because i thought like, DUH RIGHT, what thing you do doesn't involve commitment. but SORRY NO i was wrong. sometimes the commitment gets so overbearing, i can't help but harbour thoughts of quitting comp team. & then i always happen to rmb sir junyang says he hates people who quits. its like eating a cake which at first you thought was delicious, but threw it away midway through cos you thought it got bland after a while.

sry for all the times, all the times i think i got any of you pissed off. i am like that. i am always trying to pursue the things i can't get. i always felt that as long as we tried our best, its good enough. till now i still stand by tht line, because there's definetely a limit to what we can do. i never believed getting champs means getting a confirmation that we've actually succedded. there's still one yr to come, & there's such a long way to come.

i want all of you to stay happy & optimistic, no matter how tough it gets sometimes. & i cant believe i actually cried while typing this. there's a lot of things we havent affirmed, a lot of things we have not done tgt as a team. i hope daphne breaks down soon so at least each of us had broken down at least once during our comp team life. (:

i want all of us to be happy when we return from nats, even if we get last in the competition. so what if we lost terribly? we earned so much of oher things. of love, of determination, of hope, of living a dream (though its a nightmare sometimes). :D

god bless, biqi.

yay 2E chalet later! our funds is super limitd so i don't even know if we're going to have a bbq? if we're not going to have it tht's gonna suck. haha. how much bbq stuff can we buy with less then 40dollars? teehee if i treat this as another camp since i'm staying over, then i'd have 3 camps in this month! HAHA damn cool.

and i really feel like kboxing! everytime my squad kboxes i'm always overseas or not free or something. so unfair! AOP's coming up, and our great route march IC manching isn't here. ultimate lor him. never even finish anything then fly off alr. then throw everything to weisong. poor weisong. lol.

happy birthday weisong and daphne! :D okay i doubt they'd read this but.. y'knw. haha. yesterday we had his mass conversation and everyone sang happy birthday for weisong and daphne! so sweet! i didn't even had that kind of thing during my birthday, so sad.

there's group meeting on tuesday at white sands but i'm skipping not attending it cos' of my chalet! hahaha. alrights catch y'all later.
it makes me sad to see who kind of a person you actually are. it doesn't matter if it was said years ago, or whether you really mean it, or not. your hidden hopes, your secret wishings that somebody be punished, it all disgusts. all this time i know you, you're actually just someone who isn't whom you seem.

you don't know how to be true, how to be sincere, how to be even anything. how can you feel this way? you take people's goodwill for faked sincerity, and all the time i was played around your finger. can you imagine how that makes me feel?

i dont know what i can do to help, but even if i did you'd just probably think otherwise. can you not be like that, please? can you just be the person i thought i knew? you dont knw hw much it hurts.

you smile the most, but you also hate the most.
later i've still got to go to st john headquarters to and in SNCO fees and money! SIAN. but maybe i'm shopping later, so WHEE that rocks! okay that was random.

yay yay i wna watch casino royale. daniel craig, short, blonde and ugly. i still love pierce brosnan! he rocks my smelliest, smelliest socks. i can't believe he's 52. i think he only looks 40 plus?

i wna go overseas!

all that shush shush that can't be said. lol. i can only say, my hands are bloody tired.

tomorrow will be better! i must take your advice.

was requested to do this. anyway i'm bored.

7 random facts about me
#1 i hate greens
#2 i love cheesy one liners
#3 all my relatives are in malaysia
#4 i secretly love m'sia! :D
#5 i don't have edusave
#6 i was a prefect!
#7 i hate olive green, and mud yellow.

7 things that scares me
o1. flying cockroaches
o2. death
o3. lizards/bugs/creepy crawlies
o4. the movie 'SAW'
o5. murder scenes
o6. illness/sickness
o7. being sick. lol.

7 people/things I fancy
one\ computer
two\ phone
three\ mp3
four\ particular piece of paper (:
five\ shopping
six\ um, planning trainings? haha.
seven\ baking cookies! :D yumyum.

7 things I say the most
&1 really?
&2 what?
&3 why?
&4 rightt
&5 i dont know
&6 Kay
&7 bye. (lol)

7 things i like the most
1; friends/family/my squad
2; my entertainment system. haha.
3; scuffing out new songs
4; watching dramas
5; bakign cookies! :D
6; eating
7; random shopping
yum! just had my fav. noodles at 201 just now. really good! :D

i like this season's superstar's jeremy chan! the one with the headband? (: his singing's not bad & he looks damn cute. hate his dreadlocks though. he says he's been having it for 2 years, oh my god! the last time i watched extreme makeover this woman had dreadlocks for like, 10 years and her hair's really horrible, cos once you hv dreadlocks you can't cut it and the new hair that grows out from the scalp will stick to the old locks and it turns really.. you get the idea.

can't wait to go to ikea! :D oh my oh my.
went to expo today to sample & buy food! (: more of the fun came out for the repeat queues for vico chocolate, it tastes so good cos its so chilled & they give a lot compared to others. we walked halfway and we were already half full from all the sampling.

the food prices had rocketed sky high! ): the snow ice's like 3 bucks now. & haha gena keeps going about organic foods and what not. she brought a lot of things! anything no pork/no lard she's interested.

xmas suprise, hurhur.
had mini baking session over at wenyi's today!

we went to her ah-ma's hse and her erm, cousin (?) was there. small boy but has super loud voice, lol. we started with sifting the flour and all that, and our hands got downright dirty and oily from the butter especially! i think her grandpapa is very cute. ^^

gosh it was my first time baking and i didn't know anything so we just followed the recipe. it turned out pretty well in the end! we found out we used the wrong kind of flour and sugar. ): but it didn't matter it still tasted good like anything. the satisfaction has gotten to me!

its probably a mystery to you /
i'm blogging only b/c i got a new blogskin. i got the urge to blog ytd but i was suddenly very turned off by the old blogskin, and this morning i found this divine skin! :D yes the space is small and the fonts are ailenic, but the pretty image'd make up for it, right?

alrights so we watched step up ytd at some tiong bahru plaza i've never heard of or went to before. still it was a new experience, like the sun plaza. sun plaza's worse, it wasn't even listed. the movie's not as gd as wht i expected, & the only parts worth anticipating were the dance parts.

still, prince turn frog & cookies today! :D
packing day ytd! was super tiring and luckily the std 3s started much earlier, we ended around 6 plus. had 'last dinner' at KFC and i guess we were all so zonked and hungry we ate super fast and all of us ate 2 pc meal! :D

alright i need some excercise. lol.
lynette came over today and we did a little spot of studying. i really didn't want to start but i figured i'd at least give myself a month before i sit for the re-exam. i did chemistry and lucky lynette scores in tht, and then i started reading i'm the king of the castle 'cos she's studying tht for lit. nice book, really, just a little boring at the start.

tmr's packing day & um i don't really look forward to it. the thought of dragging out all the dirty moudly messy linens from the darkest corners of the cupboards doesn't exactly appeal to me, at all. alright cannot complain.

anyone got any series to recommend? :D

i've been watching my girl whole day long, from morning all the way till just now! :D

okay so i've finished watching it, the lead's so cute!

god his eyes are the best.

right, and listen to wu ke qun's nan2 yong1 (loosely translated as male maid), its ruling my steroes!

back from 3H chalet! :D

we started out with preparing the food at jiamin's house and we ended up watching she's the man instead! amanda bynes DOES look bloody like a boy when she pretends to be sebastian.

we didn't really do much during the chalet itself, and the bbq fire was damnithard to set up. haha. didn't really eat much either.

the fun didn't come on till the night where we sat down in a circle and we started saying ghost stories and we talked for damn long, i love sessions like these. (: we didn't sleep till 6am in the morning and i was damn shagged then.

i see your true colours
and tht's why i love you
so don't be afraid.
didn't really do anything much today. meet shermaine and jiamin when they went shopping at tampines mall today to buy twister.

to those who are going obs: HOPE YOU ALL ROT THERE! :D okay haha tht's mean. hope you guys have fun! see y'all soon.

its a sin to think of you,

i love your smile.

today's course entry exam 2 at greenview. it sucks to wake up early in the morning dreading the rest of the day.

me shunjie and xinyi were the only dunmanians in group 9, we had first aid MOI, footdrill MOI followed by the group interview. the first aid MOI was quite a breeze cos we didnt have to present much, only roughly 5 minutes.

footdrill MOI was slightly tougher, mutual drill was bloody long. luckily the whole thing ended slightly earlier than the time they told us because of bad attendance. only around half the people came!

when we were running around the campus, i saw their comp nursing team training, and they had to fold the bedsheet in 15 seconds flat. gee, i think we take triple tht time.

(: bye!



i want to scream: I LOVE 3H!

i love the girls in 3H. :D today was the last day of school, so we deicded to get high and um, started dancing in class, and play hide and seek in school. shermaine leeyan xinhui and melissa were the catchers, me and wenyi was a pair and we hid at this small littleeee hole outside 1I toliet.

we stayed there for like 25 minutes? haha bloody long and we were so damn uncomfortable cos' we were squatting all the time and we cldn't talk loudly somemore! haha at the end of the game only tiffny and jiamin got caught! :D we're good hiders!

had campcraft revision till 6 and now evryone's chionging FA MOI. its so screwed, we only had two days to prepare! ):
there's actually a lot of things i want to say, but somehow i don't feel like blogging, at least not right now. now i just feel like saying the things i'd prolly miss next year.

chinese lessons -
prolly the only lesosns i could sit through three periods in a row w/o feeling bored, or have the insane desire to sleep. there's always something interesting! (: its only suchapity he's not taking us next year, sighh.

my table -
has so many of my crazy doodlings when i'm bored and all that. its bloody distinctive because all the words slant to the right cos i'm left-handed. when i was young my primary school teacher once told me that all left handers have the ugliest hand writing and i was so pissd cos i knnow she's laughing at me. & then i won champion in penmanship competition, she was speechless! :D mwaha.

3H classroom -
beautifully (haha right) done up by us & mr siva at the start of the year! acutally most of the credits goes to mr siva, he painted a whole lot. 3H's really not the most pretty class, the colours are sickening (think pale sea green with an equally ugly blue), the drawings of the hurricane (looks more like springs) & ships. but we studied in there for a year! :D

TJF times -
i must say although i do not love tan jen fee, she's kept me really entertained with the things she says and does.

yuhong: are you born smart?

tjf: PARTIALLY. (looks smug)

tell me she rocks, PLEASEE. :D i love her sometimes! though sometimes i really hate her, for like calling me twice in a single lesson to answer questions.

3H, 2006, <3!>
haven't blogged in a while.

school has been about maths & chem, both bloody subjects i don't enjoy. maths sucks up every single available free period we have, and in those we don't teachers come in and teach. either way, it sucks. i really don't feel like studying.

we're even going recce-ing again tomorrow. recee is damn unpleasant & it wastes a hell lot of time. luckily tmrw all the afternoon lessons are cancelled (YAY! :D) so at least we have a bit more time. its probably the last recce we're gna have before AOP, but tht doesnt make it any better. oh well.

okays i've nothing else to blog about, laters.